The New Years Resolution that changed my life…

What’s up guys? Now Christmas is over, It’s safe to say that New Years Day is officially creeping up on us, and so I’m sure many of you are thinking about setting a New Years Resolution, or if you’re anything like me, just bracing yourself for the tsunami of inspiring “new year new me” status updates from those Facebook friends you just haven’t got round to un-friending yet.

In my adult life I never really believed in New Years Resolutions, and Quite Franklii (😉 she said it!!!) Every year without fail I would become increasingly tired of everyone indulging in some new ridiculous fad diet, and of middle aged women exclaiming how “naughty” they’ve been for eating all the mince pies. (Just so you know, every time you punish yourself for indulging in a tasty treat you deserve at Christmas, a piece of Santa’s soul wilts.) But, if you’re looking to try something realistic, meaningful and achievable this year, put down that Gym Membership you’ll use once this year and keep on reading to find out the one New Years Resolution that actually did change my life.

 


 

You reap what you sow…

Growing up, I was always a confident child. Then I got bullied, had abusive relationships and shitty/toxic friends. As an INFP, my thoughts have always been fairly altruistic and kind, so I struggled a great deal growing up and realising this was not inside everyone. I found myself listening to girls tearing each other down and speaking behind each other’s backs, often saying things I would never even think, let alone say. Though these experiences didn’t necessarily affect my thought patterns- they definitely did impact the way in which I viewed the world, I became more cynical and much much more ‘shy’ and ‘reserved’ with my opinions- mostly for fear of standing out, looking odd or weird.

In 2015, a friend made an innocent comment that really stuck with me. He said “I love it when you give compliments, because it happens so rarely I know when you approve of something you really mean it.” At the time, I was in a major depressive episode, and was on a really serious spiritual journey to find out more about who I really was. Naturally, this involved a great deal of self-reflection.

I’d always known I wasn’t the most demonstrative person, I’ve always been a little reserved, and consequently accused of being “cold-hearted” and detached. As I mentioned previously, though I would laugh and play into that stereotype, this was never because I didn’t have love to give, more that I was very guarded and careful with who I shared it with. (Now, actually, this is a trait that I’ve accepted and actually like about myself, as it provides an extra ‘security check’- My empathetic nature often means that people will take advantage of me and drain my energy.)

But- I didn’t realise I was withholding admiration for those closest to me.

This really got me thinking, when was the last time I complimented my mother? My grandmother? My closest friends? A stranger? The truth was, I’d become so paranoid about coming across as creepy, or weird, that I had begun to come across as cynical and cold.

Now, I don’t necessarily totally believe in ‘the law of attraction’, but I definitely do believe in karma. I try hard nowadays to be as kind as possible to people, because regardless of how much someone dislikes me, I never want people to be able to say that I was unkind. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” if you will. Thinking about this, It was then, that I made my New Years Resolution.

If you have nice thoughts, be kind and give compliments freely, (and the hard part) even if your anxiety tells you it makes you look weird.
This is about reconditioning your mind, and reminding yourself that no matter what your anxiety or your insecurities say, it doesn’t. By reaching out to say something kind, what is the worst that can happen? Perhaps the recipient does think you’re a little odd, or a little creepy- but at least you’ve maybe made them feel good and boosted their ego even the slightest bit.

I think so often in this world of social media, it can be so tempting to just give stuff a “like” and move on with your day. But what makes this Resolution so achievable is that you can even ease into it by exercising it on social media. Instead of just leaving a like- tell someone you love the way they do their makeup, their writing style, their work ethic.

The more you do this, the more you will be encouraged to continue doing it. It’s honestly so rewarding. 9 times out of 10, people will generally be so grateful, especially for the more thought out kind gestures, that it will really boost your confidence, ease your anxiety and actually make you feel good yourself.

So, if you don’t have a Resolution yet, you never usually stick to them, you don’t believe in them, or you think they’re all meaningless- think again, and maybe consider making a simple vow to work on yourself and try to give compliments and give love freely. You’ll be surprised by how instantly your own life will become more positive and light.

really hope you guys enjoyed this post, and that perhaps it’s inspired you to give kindness a little more freely in 2018. With the amount of hatred and the global political climate we’ve been left with after 2017, it’s more apparent than ever that there can never be too much love and kindness in the world. Pick up the phone and tell someone they are awesome today.

Happy New Year everyone!

Love from,

Frankii. X

My Perfect Roast Turkey & Christmas Day Recipes!

Hi guys! Another quick little recipe selection for you all today, here is my Christmas day agenda, including how I make the perfect (not-as-dry-as-ghandi’s-flipflop) roasted turkey! 

Turkey:

(Did you know that the traditional British Christmas bird was goose?)

  1. Set your oven to 180 degrees C. Oil a deep roasting tin.
  1. Remove the neck, giblets, and packet near the front shoulders, rinse thoroughly and pat dry. Place the turkey in the tin and loosely stuff the cavity loosely. Brush it with oil and insert the meat thermometer into the thigh, making sure not to touch bone as this gives and inaccurate reading. Salt and pepper to taste.
  1. Make a foil tent for the turkey, leaving about an inch of space to allow heat to circulate. Crimp the tent to the sides of the pan.
  1. Roast the turkey until the thermometer reads 180 degrees C. For turkeys from Tesco (UK), it usually has a calculated time on the bag based on the weight. We got a large – 5.3-6.9 kgs or 11.6-15.2 lbs. This would typically take between 3 hrs 15 mins – 3 hrs 50 mins, with an additional 30 mins for the stuffing. To ensure browning and perfect crispy stuffing, remove the foil tent after an hour or so of roasting.

Roasted veg:

Carrots, parsnips, squash, potatoes, and sweet potatoes. Cut into similar shapes and sizes, peel and half the roots. Toss in a ½ cup of sage, a ½ cup of thyme, and several sprigs of rosemary (fresh is best!) and one whole bulb of garlic. (My family- especially my sister! love to eat it roasted by just squeezing the garlic out of the clove… though I don’t recommend this if you are planning any mistletoe related activities later on!!) Salt and pepper to taste. Chuck them in around the turkey about an hour before pulling the turkey out. I usually separate half of my veg because my mum is vegetarian/pescatarian  –  and cook separately.

Gravy:

My famous gravy is always made in the bottom of the meat dish (with separate gravy granules and water mix for my veggie mum). I usually make it by pouring a majority of the loose oil out, leaving a few tablespoons worth. I then mix cornflour and water in a small glass and whisk the slurry into the hot oil until no excess oil remains. This should thicken, and the slurry substance should mix with the meat juices and become a brown, thick-ish substance. Pour boiling water and pop a stock cube in, then whisk to the desired volume and thickness. Pop in chopped onions and gravy granules/herbs of your choice for extra flavour (if you desire) and boil adding water until desired quality.

Super Easy Christmas Stuffing Recipe

Hey guys, I know I promised some festive recipes that I love a while back, so here’s one of my staples that I also use throughout the year when I do big roast dinners, I hope you’ll love it as much as I do.

I’m a much better chef than I am a baker, because I’m never one to really measure my flavourings. I’m one of those people who can never create a recipe twice! But it’s been suggested to me by my friends a few times that I should try and write down some basic guides, so I’ve really tried to record some.

Ingredients 
Serves: 10 

  • About 200-250g of cubed bread, as rough as you like. Sometimes I just tear mine. I usually do about a 2:3 ratio of White to Wholemeal, but thats my preference.
  • One tube of sausage meat, or a few sausages with the skin removed. (if you are vegetarian, at the first blender stage I would add a couple of slices of bread and an egg. This makes a sticky breadcrumb mix that tastes great and will hold its shape in a similar way.)
  • 1 medium onion
  • a generous helping (about 3 Teaspoons or more depending on preference) of dried sage
  • a generous helping of dried rosemary
  • a generous helping of dried thyme
  • a generous helping of parsley, fresh is best but dry is fine too!
  • 1 apple, cored and sliced
  • a handful of dried cranberries, I’ve also used a Cranberry jelly before when in a pinch.
  • Lazy Garlic, 1 teaspoon.
  • 1 Stock cube
  • 50g (2 oz) unsalted butter, melted

 

 

  1. Preheat oven to 180 C / Gas mark 4.
  2. What I like to do next may be a little naughty, but there’s always room to cheat at this stressful time of year! What I do, is simply bung the apple. the onion, the herbs, a stock cube, and the cranberry’s into my Nutribullet (any blender/processor would work). That wicked little device isn’t just for smoothies you know! I only really pulse it until it is a rough paste, but if you prefer finer flavours then go ahead and let it go a little longer.
  3. Pop in a little bit of water, perhaps about a cup- to activate your stock cube, along with a teaspoon of lazy garlic and your melted butter (I do this in the microwave) and pulse it again until you have a peculiar slurry.
  4. Lightly toast your bread cubes, this can be done by popping them on a baking tray for 5 or so minutes.
  5. In a large bowl, mix in your paste/slurry mix with the sausage meat and bread cubes, (Disclaimer: some people like to cook their sausage meat before hand, however I’ve never found that I needed to, I’ll leave this down to you. If you choose to do so, I would imagine you could knock off a significant amount of cooking time. Say, 30 or so minutes. I prefer to leave mine to cook inside the bird or a baking tray so that it comes out at a similar time.)
  6. Spoon into turkey to loosely fill and cook along with your bird. (if you pack it too tightly, it may cause your turkey and stuffing to cook slightly unevenly, as it will prevent air from circulating.) Or of course, if you prefer or have left overs, pop it into a greased baking tray or pyrex dish for about 40 minutes, or until a skewer comes out clean.

The Christmas Tag

Hey guys! Again, apologies for my inconsistencies but you know how life gets at this time of year! However, when I received this tag from Naomi over at FatFashionBlogs I knew It would make a wonderful way for me to transition back into the world of blogging! I hope you all enjoy it!

Q1 – What is a Christmas tradition you do every year without fail?

Bizarrely, considering how much I love Christmas, my family never really were super into the festive season- I feel like they get a bit caught up in the stress as a pose to the magic. For this reason, we don’t really have too many traditions, but every year the whole (close) family will wake up super early, and we will always wait for a call from Grandma (our Matriarch and queen!!) and then we will all make our way there to open presents and lounge in front of the TV while xmas dinner cooks.

However, since getting married and having my own little house with my husband we are super excited to start picking up some traditions of our own!

Q2 – What is a Christmas tradition you do every year other people might find strange?

I don’t really know if it counts as “strange”, but most of my family don’t really drink- with the exception of Bucks Fizz on Christmas day. I know a lot of people who get a bit tipsy on Christmas day, but that has never really happened in my lifetime. We do however, almost always seem to end up watching March of the Penguins!

Q3- What is your favourite Christmas movie and song?

My favourite Christmas movie is actually probably the Grinch- I love watching it now as an adult even more so, as I actually find it hilarious how much I now relate to the Grinch himself!!

Q4 – What is the best and worst present you’ve every received?

I think possibly the best present I ever received was my DSLR camera when I was about 17, because back then I never anticipated how it would change my life and inspire a lifelong interest in media and photography/film.

I wouldn’t say I’ve ever really received a “bad” present, but the one we still joke about to this day was the one year mum went “off-list” and bought me an at home laser hair removal kit! While it’s super practical, I still always joke about how it was a hint about my tash! (lol)

Q5 – What is one beauty product you are excited about using this year for Christmas looks?

One!? Oh, its so hard to choose.. lately I’ve been loving the Marc Jacobs Velvet Noir mascara I received as a PR from John Lewis through Influenster a while back- It really helps to finish a look even if you don’t want to use lashes. However, every Christmas I always get much more experimental with my lipsticks, and I love the way Jeffree Star’s Velour Liquid Lip in shade “crocodile tears” gives me festive Slytherin glam vibes. As far as drug store goes, I’m actually loving the ___ palette from Sleek at the moment!! Though it does have a little bit of fallout, I am obsessed with the metallic sheen you can achieve with such an affordable palette!!

Q6 – What is your go to Christmas Party Dress this year?

Oh gosh, can I say my birthday suit? I don’t actually have that many close friends who live near me anymore- especially since I got married, I feel like my single friends think I don’t really go out anymore by choice. (It isn’t!) so it’s rare that I get invited to things. (boo!) Nevertheless, I was never a GREAT lover of dresses anyway, as I’m quite tall AND large breasted, so I find most dresses come up much much shorter than they ought to. My go to Christmas outfit is definitely the PJs you get on Christmas Eve! How could it be anything else!?

Q7 – What are you most looking forward to this Christmas time?

This Christmas I am most looking forward to sharing my second Christmas with my husband and watching my family open the gifts I got them. My genuine favourite part about Christmas is buying/making gifts for my loved ones, I just think it’s the most rewarding feeling ever! (and the food, of course.)

I Tag

Britt

Meg

Lynz

Sophie

Becky